The Love Affair of Severus Snape
by wickedwillowtree
Summary: Severus Snape meets someone. Falls in love. Looses her. May get her back … we’ll see! Be nice it is my first long fic! ReviewRated for language and possible graphic text.
1. Rayne

**The Love Affair of Severus Snape**

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing it all belongs to the amazing Mrs. Rowling. Luckily I do own Rayne…so yah.. she is mine! Moo-ha-ha…

**A/N: **I have been drabbling with this fic for some time now and this is my like my first chapter. I meant for there to be some mystery so if you are like good confused and want to know more about the mystery.. good. But if you are like .. what the fuck is this person talking about…then give me a review saying that and ill make it clearer! so yah.. without further a due… the love affair of Severus Snape.

" Five points from Gryffindor." Said Professor Snape.

He could not even bring himself to snarl or smirk or even assign detention to Potter for once again blowing up his cauldron. Thoughts of her screams kept ringing in his ear distracting him from the entire present. If he had been at all aware of his surroundings he would have saw the confused looks of the entire N.E.W.T.S potion, Snape never missed an opportunity to make Harry's life hell – usually without reason and he now had the perfect opportunity to assign the boy punishment and he allowed it to slip by? But all he could see when he looked around the room was her lying in the grass having her limbs being pulled apart by multiple Crusaders Curses, her blood being spilled all over the grass. He had been like this for two days, teaching his classes in a mute haze and becoming so inebriated at night that he fell asleep because he passed out from becoming so dizzy from the colors all around him.

Vaguely he heard the bell ringing and automatically commanded the dunderheads to leave his classroom. As soon as the dungeon doors slammed shut, signaling all the students should be walking along to the Great Hall for lunch, Severus sat behind his desk, put his head down on it and began to sob uncontrollable. At first it came in shallow gasps and as the memories flashing through his mind become more pronounced his ragged breaths turned into loud moans of desperation.

Four days ago if you had asked the Potions master the last time he cried he would have told you it was when he was eleven years old.

FLASHBACK

As he rounded the corner harsh cries began to come forth from his lips and he felt the hot tears welding up in his eyes. Why did McGonagall have to ask him that? How more embarrassing than to be held over in class by none other than his least favorite teacher, to then be question if his mother ever taught him how to properly bathe? Not only did she imply that she agreed with the 'slimy – greasy – haired git' names but she brought up his mother. He sat there trembling in anger as she mention her proposal of teaching him the art and usefulness of shampoo, but now as the memories of his mothers love pierced his heart the heated anger turned into heated sobs.

He began to run, faster and faster hoping against hope that he could out run the memories of her. How her lovely hands used to rub soap over his swollen body…how she sang him a lullaby as she worked. He loved when she gave him those warm baths as a child; she would take care of him after his father unmercifully beat the crap out of him. She would wipe all thee tears and bloody away and tell him that everything would be better in the morning and his father would be in better mood. She would say that he just had a "hard day at work" or "had a stressful meeting" and how "we needed to understand his need to vent on us."

I always believed her, her words seemed to be like an oversized magical eraser that would just erase away all the horrible things that his father caused. But now she was gone and McGonagall had to remind him of the kindness that she and always shown him…

Suddenly Severus relies that he had run directly outside and was just about to hit...

To late… blubbering crying Sinvellus Snape ran directly into Sirius Black, who proceeded to inform the entire school, that was currently outside, that Snape was crying. Needless to say this was when he earned the nickname "Sinvellus" and he vowed to never cry again.

ENDFLASHBACK

That was until two days ago when he had last seen her and since then he had broken down twice in front of people and eight times alone. How could he be endlessly tormented by unforgivable (s) and be able to perfectly function, but now allow one women to turn him into a blubbering fool. He could barely believe that he had only meet her at the beginning of the year, had only known her for less than six months and had already lost her. He could still fondly remember that first time that he met Rayne.

FLASHBACK

"Albus, some people don't have all day to wait around for some new DADA teacher who is obviously not dedicated to the job if he cannot even make it to an informal lunch on time.' Snapped Severus.

Albus had requested that the staff report to the Great Hall at 12:00 in order to meet the new teacher. It was now 12:22 and he was not here.

"No, no she still has 8 minuets to arrive. I am sure she will be here on time, Severus don't worry." Replies Albus.

Not only did this completely befuddle Severus but also it was said in one of Albus' infuriating calm and superior voices.

Before Severus could retort Minerva spoke up, Severus had sensed that she had been getting restless also. " Albus, I don't mean to be rude but what in heavens name do you mean she has eight more minuets, I thought you said…"

She was interrupted by Albus' raised right hand. "I do apologize deeply to all of you, but Rayne owled me this morning and informed me that she would be arriving at 12:30 and she hoped that it would not be an incontinence. Since I had already told everyone 12:00 and I did not know the precise location of the entire staff at the time I decided that we would make use of that time and explore socializing with each other, we do it so rarely anymore. I fear that we all tend to overwork and what an amazing opportunity to relax! As I said before I am sure that she will be arriving shortly."

No one dare question Albus after his lengthily explanation but it but a deep scowl on Severus' face, only Ablus could turn a useful working 30 minuets into a wasted socializing event and get away with it! As every second ticked by Severus became more annoyed with his current situation and when he was about to protest that Albus should at least _feed_ them that Great Hall doors we burst open and in he stepped.

As Severus took a closer look he realized that he was a _SHE, _how could Ablus give _his_ job away to a female who looked barely over 25? On a closer examination he realized that she was quite stunning. _Wait have you gone fucking mad! She is not gorgeous she is steeling your job! _

Her long brown hair fell beneath her neck sitting resting on her shoulder blades. It was a rich chocolate brown and completely straight. She looked quite short at least a foot shorter than him. _Good she will have to look me up in the eyes! Always intimidating. _As Albus directed her closer to the staff table, in the middle of the Great Hall, he noticed that her hair was BLUE? Yes, he was quite sure that she had strips of blue, red and violet hair intermixed with her natural chocolate brown. _How childlike. I cannot believe that Albus would hire someone who did not even have a true hair color. _

Any further inspection of her disposition or appearance would have to be postponed for she and Albus and finally reached the table and he was introducing her.

"I would like you to all meet Professor Hurst, our new DADA teacher. This is Minerva McGonagall, transfiguration teacher, Hagrid, the grown keeper…

As Albus began drowning on with the introductions Severus took the opportunity to place _Miss Hurst _under his careful watch.

Surprising she was not exhibiting the usually nervous habits that most of the new teachers tend to do, such as ringing the hands, slouching or biting their lower lip. All those habits irked Severus immensely, making the first reason for him to dislike the new teacher. But this one was standing perfectly still and straight, looking each Professor in the eye and making a curt bow of the head and a warm smile in each of their directions when Albus introduced them. One particular name drew him away from his wary inspection of Miss Hurst… his.

"…And lastly this is Severus Snape, the Potions Master here at Hogwarts." Finished Albus.

Positioning his lips into the perfect sneer and his eyes into a dark and threatening glare Severus 'greeted' the new Professor. He was excepting to receive a terrified and frightened look in response, but what he received honestly shocked him. She looked him dead in the eye and gave him the largest smirk (one that would rival Malfoy's) that he had ever seen. Also uncharacteristic to her other greetings she responded with words that dripped with sarcasm.

" What a _pleasant_ experience to meet your acquaintance……_Professor Snape_."

Albus saved him from attempting to reply with another sarcastic comment by saying, " Now that we are all aquatinted shall the feast begin?" and with a clap of his warm hands a surplus of food appeared on the table.

ENDFLASHBACK

As real as his dream seemed in Severus' head he could not help but wonder why Ablus' clapping had seemed so pronounced…"bang, bang, BANG…"

As he came back into the realm of the living Severus concluded that there must be someone actually at his door., _bloody hell he could not even have one moment alone anymore. Maybe if he wished hard enough the banging would just stop! _After a few more seconds of this attempt to wish the noise away Severusaccepted defeat and with a gruff nod he replied, " GO AWAY… you should be digesting food at this minute not bothering me!"

A soft but commanding voice came from behind the door ""Severus, please open this door.. I need to speak with you about your current emotional state."

If it had been any one else's voice that fluttered to Severus' ears other than Albus' he would have continued to dismiss them, but he accepted defeat. And with a wave of his hand he thrusts open the previously closed doors.

Not removing is head from the table Severus barked, " What do you want. I would personally prefer to be left alone and to wallow in self pity!"

"Ah, if you were wallowing in self pity _alone_ I would not be here, Severus. But your uncharacteristic behavior has everyone confused and annoyed."

His anger forced Severus form his depressed state, " Firstly, the last time I checked you were mad at me for keeping all my emotions inside me and was griping at me to let someone in."

The longer he spoke the fiercer his words grew. "Also I am well aware the entire staff and order members, excluding you, are not talking to me. Just merely glaring at me every chance they get." By this point Severus was nearly shouting at Albus. " So why in the fuck do I care if I have everyone confused and annoyed?" Now Severus was completely yelling at Albus and banging his fist on his desk to emphasize certain points. " Do they really think that I am that much of a monster? That I have no heart at all? That I just sat there watching the best thing that has every happened to me be destroyed?" Now Severus was sobbing again. "Hun Albus…what do you think? Since you seem to e the only one to care about me anymore." And as a side note to himself he added. "Not that many people really did in the first place."

By this point Severus was not really forming audible words just merely bawling and Albus took this as a good time to come over and rap his in a loving embrace and sooth his with comforting words.

" I know my dear boy, I suspected that you had something to do with her ability to escape. You were merely playing the role of the double agent. Witch I fear has consumed you all too much…  
now taking his chin and bringing it up to his eyes Albus continued. " But Severus, you need to tell them, the order, that you saved her…that you were just doing your job…"

Severus had been very allowing of Albus touching him but at this suggestion he immediately jerked away. "NO" he screamed! "SHE CANNOT KNOW" Severus was totally hysterical ". IF SHE THINKS THAT I TRIED TO KILL HER SHE WILL STAY AWAY.. FROM ME AND THEY CANNOT GET HER! SHE WILL BE SAFE IF THE DEATH EATERS CANNOT USE ME TO GET TO HER!

After Albus grabbed Severus' arms and pined them to his side he calmed down. And in ragged breaths Severus sobbed out." Albus… please, let them hate me as long as she is safe… that is all that matters to me… as long as she is alive…"

With a deep sign Albus replied, " My dear boy, I will honor your request if you do me one favor."

Severus' argent nodding prodded Albus to continue. " Return to your normal self. As much as I hate telling you this…burry all these feelings deep inside, like you are so good at doing. Go back to your normally way of coping with the hell that you live, pretend that it does not bother you."

Releasing Severus arms Albus somberly retreated from the room.


	2. Bull shit

**The Love Affair of Severus Snape**

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing it all belongs to the amazing Mrs. Rowling. Luckily I do own Rayne…so yah.. she is mine! Moo-ha-ha…

**Summary: **Severus Snape meets someone. Falls in love. Looses her. May get her back … we'll see! Be nice it is my first long fic! **Revie**w Rated for language and possible graphic text.

Chapter 2

The images of her days at school kept flashing in her head as she walked down corridor after corridor. Around the next corner she came upon the fountain where she had witnessed Potter and Black beating up some poor boy in black robes. That had not been a happy day for them that is after she had screamed at them and proceeded to hit Remus multiple times for not stopping them. She continued along her familiar path, recalling all the pain that that year at Hogwarts had caused her. It was a wonder that she switched schools…her thoughts carried her all the way to the entrance for the Ravencalw dormitories. She had not realized how caught up in the past she had gotten, not even knowing where she was wondering.

"I guess habit kicked in, leading me back here..." She voiced aloud smiling to her self.

" The first sign of going crazy is taking to your self…" said drawling voice form behind her. Still keeping her back to him Rayne said,

" And the second sign is when you being to hear voices." With that she spun around, wand at the ready and a very promenade smirk on her face.

" Albus though that you may have gotten lost since you did not show up for lunch and sent me looking for you." Severus replied to the dramatic looking Rayne. " There is really no need to be pointing your wand at me.. I am merely trying to help." The last bit even Severus could not help but smirk at. He could even tell how much sarcasm was dripping off his words.

"Bull shit." Rayne replied.

end flashback

" Bull Shit…" muttered Rayne

"RAYNE!" Mrs. Weasley screamed at Rayne. " Darling, wake up…"

" Hun….what…um…." (more non-coherent sounds) from Rayne

" You just had a bad dream, and you muttered aloud an inappropriate word."

By this point even a half asleep Rayne could here the unmistakable snickering coming form the mouths of Fred and George Weasley who were visiting their mother this fine afternoon.

" O dear." Rayne tried to mock concern. " Let me reassure you Mrs. Weasley it was quite a nice dream…did I fall asleep on the couch again?"

"Yes I am afraid that you did love. But no matter it is much easier to tend to your needs f you are just down here."

" Now Mrs. Weasley, I have told you time and time again that I am perfectly capable of getting my own food and fluids."

Mrs. Weasley now took on her famous motherly voice, " Dear…firstly I have asked you to call me Molly many times. Also you almost died the least that I can do …"

That was as far as _Molly_ got before Rayne sat up on the couch and stared directly into _Molly's_ eyes and stated, " It was not the first time that I almost died and just because that unfortunate event happened does not mean that I have become a hopeless baby. Before Molly could interject Rayne continued. " Also … I appreciate your concern but we are in Grimmage Place, where **I **happen to be lodging and you cannot boss people around places that are not even yours. So further more… ( now Rayne was quite annoyed and making her way to the stairs.) leave me and my headache the HELL alone!" and with that she stormed up the stairs.


	3. Severus’ Drug Problems

**The Love Affair of Severus Snape**

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing it all belongs to the amazing Mrs. Rowling. Luckily I do own Rayne…so yah... she is mine! Moo-ha-ha…

**A/n:** This chapter and most of the rest of this story is / will be composed of flashbacks. If they get too confusing and you have no fucking idea what time period that the story is currently in give me a review and let me know!

**Summary: **Severus Snape meets someone. Falls in love. Looses her. May get her back … we'll see! Be nice it is my first long fic! **Revie**w Rated for language and possible graphic text.

Chapter 3: Severus' Drug Problems

The rest of the day passed in a relative haze for Severus. He really tried to take Albus' words to heart but it really was not working. Somewhere between his 4 and 7 years potions classes he had decided that Rayne had become a drug to him. Yes, she had become this amazing drug that he was addicted to and was having withdrawal symptoms from going without her for so long.

Then around the 5th year class, after three children had been sent to the hospital wing because he had not been paying attention to the particular potion that they were brewing (for if he had been he would have realized that Miss Martin added too many sprouts of worm for the healing drought which caused the reverse of the desired effect… exploding and causing deep wounds on the three children in question.) Severus decided that he must see Rayne that evening no matter what the repercussions form his actions may be. Just to look into her eyes and see that she was safe and healthy…um... healthier, would make him content for another week hopefully As he signed Severus realized that all he would see was hate and loathing in her eyes toward the man that had told her that he loved her… sign

On his way to the Great Hall that evening for dinner that evening Severus began to seriously dough the wisdom in going to Grimmage Place that evening. For he knew that he would not be greeted with friendly smiles. But the more he thought about it the more he realized that he was never greeted with friendly smiles anywhere he went so why would now matter to him.

This comforting thought took Severus all the way to his seat in the Great Hall and Severus was beginning to discover that he was indeed a little bit hungry until Albus approached him.

" Ah Severus, just the man that I was wanting to talk to. Tonight I have called an emergency meeting of the Order and your presence is required. Please report to Headquarters at 9:00 sharp."

Severus had known Albus to long to mistake his comment as a question; he was required to be there no matter if no one (including himself) wanted him there. Now he wanted to see Rayne, but not the rest of them.

For the rest of the meal Severus moved food around his plate and pondered the real reason he was dreading this meeting. It was not the harsh stares and evil glares form the Order members…particularly, he was used to that.

But the stony glowers McGonagall was throwing him at dinner we staring to scare him. They may have had their differences when he was a student but over the years Severus had grown quite fond of the old bat. And her anger was staring to sting his heart.

The main thing that he realized that he was dreading was confronting Rayne. It still made him queasy to think what he did to her.


	4. Getting Ready

**The Love Affair of Severus Snape**

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing it all belongs to the amazing Mrs. Rowling. Luckily I do own Rayne…so yah.. she is mine! Moo-ha-ha…

**Summary: **Severus Snape meets someone. Falls in love. Looses her. May get her back … we'll see! Be nice it is my first long fic! **Revie**w Rated for language and possible graphic text.

**A/N:** This is an elongated flashback with will span over quite possibly many chapters so just realize that it is all set in the past until you see the END FLASHBACK marking 

Chapter 4

FLASHBACK

" I have the tickets and we are eating at _Donatello's _which is just down the street from the theatre." Rayne told Severus through the door which led to his bathroom.

She was in his room adjusting her make –up and earrings while Severus was trying desperately to scrub all the grease out of his hair. He still did not know why he honestly bothered with it,_ it has always been greasy no matter how many time that you wash I'_ he tried to remind himself before he started in on the soap bottle again. But his discouraging advice was not stopping him from dunking his head under the facet again. _Plus she says that she like its "dramatic shin" … HA who was she really kidding, not him! _

"Severus! Did you hear me?" Rayne yelled at him.

"Yes dear, it looks lovely." Severus automatically called back to her.

(Laughing follows from the next room and the bathroom door creaks open unfortunately for Severs he noticed non of this as he was to preoccupied with this hair problems.) ;-)

Smiling all the way Rayne snuck put form behind Severus and grabbed his soapy hand away from his reddening scalp. As he looked up at her he stared to blush.

" Darling, how can it 'look lovely' when you are on the other side of the door and not even look at me?" This was flowed by more blushing from Severus.

"Um... well…"

"Sh… now get out of the bath, your scalp is almost as red as your face, I think that you have washed a surplus of times." Rayne pleaded with him.

Before Severus could utter some more non-coherent sounds or try to force his face from turning crimson Rayne tilted down her head and gently kissed Severus on the lips.

Severus was not really having a problem with the current sate of being (after all he was sitting in a rather cold bath at this point ;-) But Rayne pulled away and ordered him to get dressed, leaving him to it.

After rising out the soap in his hair and giving it one more really good wash Severus stepped out and dried off. After casting a drying spell on his hair and being satisfied that it look slightly better, Severus wrapped himself in his towel and made his way to his dresser. He noticed that Rayne was slipping on a beautiful black robe that was embroidered with green stars and moons along a long a bleat on the side. It was also quite fitted, showing how many curved she really had. Her hair was all died a rich brown tonight and pulled up in large curls on top of her head. There were also selected strands hanging down along her neck that were slightly curled. She looked beautiful…

"Severus, I think that it would be nice if you wear a dress robe and not a bath towel."

"Right…I was just admiring how stunning you look to night."

It was now Rayne's turn to slightly blush, "Why thanks, but you really should get dressed or we will be late."

"Right…"

After selecting a black silk dress robe from him amour (Big shock there) Rayne hooked her arm around Severus' and they headed toward their apparition point in Hogsmead.

So what you think? Am I getting worse or are you on the edge of your seats waiting for the next chapter? What ever you think I would really appreciate a review telling me your thought either encouraging or helpful so u can improve my 'technique' **smiles**

Please review!


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